I was reading through a few posts on gratitude, and came across some comments in which I began to notice a certain ideology behind why gratitude hasn't worked out for some people. Admittedly not all things work exceptionally well for every single person. However one of the underlying ideas seemed to be that merely writing down lists of things someone is grateful for ought to bring happiness, success, money and love, etc. This is perpetrated when there is no explanation as to how gratitude works, so I thought I will share with you how it worked for me. 

No, it was not by mindlessly writing down lists of things I was grateful for. Every morning I took time to think and reflect, upon doing so I was able to list down specifically what I was grateful for. As I mentioned in my previous post, I found that pin-pointing what I was grateful for, such as support from my family, helped me more than writing something in general like, 'I'm grateful for my family'. 

While it almost seems miraculous, the way gratitude works; I assure you it is not a miracle. What it promotes is a shift in the mindset. Being grateful allows you to think about what you have, instead of what you haven't got. 

Imagine someone who experiences a minor blip like in his/ her relationship. It's very easy in this case for that person to look at themselves negatively, engage in self-blaming, and be preoccupied with the classic,  'Where have I gone wrong?', or 'What is wrong with me?' thoughts. 

This person would then nit-pick everything that's wrong with the relationship, everything that's wrong with the other person in the relationship, and with emotions running high, they will engage in distancing or reacting negatively towards the other person. They would soon realise that the world is against them leading to the 'Why me?', 'Why is the world keeping us apart?' thought process. Notice the domino effect that takes place.

Imagine instead, someone appreciating the fact that they have someone to share their life with or someone who is grateful for having a continuous source of support and strength.

In being grateful, we open our eyes and widen our perspective. We look for solutions or work around the problem. Whereas in the earlier situation, a person will continually consume time to think about everything that is going wrong, in this situation a person who is grateful will immediately pick up the phone to call or drop a message to their S/O or schedule a time to talk through what's going right and what's going wrong. The other person too will begin to notice how much more effort you are putting into the relationship, and will value the commitment. 

Do you think this person will now experience more love in their life, more success in their relationship, and feel more happy about the place they are in at the moment?

It's not all that magical or miraculous now is it?

Gratitude is a shift in perspective which logically explains why people who engage in the practice of gratitude experience love, success and happiness in a wholesome manner.

So there you go, the thought that merely listing things you're grateful for will enable you to lead a more fulfilling life is a common misconception.

Gratitude is a thought, a feeling, and an action. So make sure you experience it wholly.

Let me know what your thoughts are on practicing gratitude.

Thank you so much for reading,
Much Love,